Author Archives: SilasKM

About SilasKM



I havent written in this blog for over a year now.

But I want to update everyone what has been going on.

So I need to re-vamp this blog.
I went and looked at all my old posts, and from reading the very first posts back in 2013.
It’s just disappointing how arrogant and immature I sound.
Reading through most of my old posts, showed me that who I was 3 years ago was a very insecure little man seeking attention but lacking sonship.
I also said alot of things that didnt make any sense and most of it being wishful thinking.
However, I’ve decided to just keep those old posts, to show the audience how far I have come and where I am now. Yes, including the profanity and arrogant/immaturity existing in my old posts, I’ve decided to just be completely transparent and be raw.

Some of the old posts was about future goals that I had my eyes set on in 2013.
Which was to go to YWAM and IHOPKC.

Funny how that actually came true now.

I’ll try to be real quick about it, brief recap.
So in 2012, encountered the Holy Spirit in my first missions trip in Ecuador.
Then a prophet told me that I am a forerunner and should go to ihopkc.
Doubted & Hesitant, Discerned for 3 years to see whether I should give up everything I have going for me and go to IHOPKC.
During those 3 years dwindled my spiritual life to trash.
I was rotting as months went by.
I was going no-where.
I read my old journal of the old entry posts that reminded me again of how Real YHWH was. So I packed my bags and left to Kansas City.
I asked YHWH where should I go first, ihopkc or ywam?
YHWH told me to go to YWAM to teach me what community looks like.
So I went, best 6 months of my life ever. I learned so much.
Now I’m an ihopkc intern.
And the Lord now has instructed me to stay here for 7 years, because I need more discipleship & covering.

The Big Difference of Who I am today VS Who I was then before Kansas City.

Who I am Today: Knows the FEAR OF THE LORD
Who I was then: Ran on FEAR OF MAN.

During my time at YWAM, I learned alot of what Sonship is.
And Now at IHOPKC, I’m walking in Sonship.

and Sonship is so important to me now, That’s all I care about.
If you dont have Sonship, then you become so insecure about your appearance and you care about what people think of you.
But if you have Sonship, you could care less of what people say about you, because only the opinion of YHWH matters.
And it shows through your confidence in Him.

to be continued.

Albert Silas Full Bio

In 1989 to 2001 (age 4 to age 15), I’ve grown up in the church, I attended a Presbyterian Church for 12 years.
In 1995 (age 9), I accepted Jesus Christ as my Savior in 1995 during my 3rd grade elementary years attending a Christian school.
In 2001 to 2004, I attended a Methodist Church & Baptist Church.
In 2004 to 2005, I hung out with the wrong crowd in partying, alcoholism, drugs, drug dealing, physical fighting, gangs, sex, lust.
In 2005 to 2006, I went to a church retreat and returned to God, got baptized by the water.
2006 to 2011, backslid Christian.
2012, is when I became baptized by the Spirit after encountering the supernatural during a missions trip overseas, and had a revelation that impacted my life.
And started walking in the process of being a “Spirit-filled Believer”.
2012 – 2015 is when I went out to grow more in the faith, I attended many Christian conferences, worship events, evangelical movements, churches, small groups, house of prayers consistently.
2015 – Present, Now going to fulfill into what God’s calling me into.

Detailed Story:
Now my Mom & my mother’s side of the family has always been a Presbyterian Christian.
But my dad & my dad’s side of the family has always been atheists, agnostics, and Buddhists.
Shortly after, they met each other and got married and I was born.
My dad’s parents & sister (my grandmother, grandfather & aunt) was influenced by my mom’s faith and accepted Jesus Christ as their Savior.
Whereas my dad, uncle, and my other aunts and uncles, and cousins were still atheists, agnostics, Buddhists.
So I was brought up in a weird environment growing up during my childhood.
My mom decorated the house with Christian morals.
But since my dad was the man of the house, it was under his control.
My dad also had a very successful and lucrative business, where he was also a billionaire.
We lived in a mansion, owned several houses across the nation, private jets, a limo, several cars, several condos, and several other businesses.
But during my dad’s entrepreneurial lifestyle, there were other perilous opportunities that shifted his decision-making into the wrong choices, such as alcoholism, drugs, domestic violence, physical abuse, emotional abuse, mental abuse, manipulation, spiritual abuse, sensuality, sexual perversion, gambling, adulteration, quarrelling, gangs, pornography, became some of the things that existed in not only in the house, but as well throughout my childhood.
I was exposed to all of these corrupted values at a very young age at age 2 throughout my life.
But my mom being so grained into the Christian value of loving with an unconditional heart and forgiveness, she continued to persevere through all the turmoil.
I was always forced to go to church with my mom since 1989 to 2001.
My dad on the other hand, at first did go to church from 1985, read the entire bible at least 10 times from cover to cover, but stopped going after a couple of years and doesn’t believe in God.
I lived 2 lives throughout my years.
1 life was when I was always in the church, and the other life was being brought up in a house with domestic violence, physical abuse, alcoholism, gambling, adultery, etc.
After I became an adolescent (age 15 to age 19, 2001 to 2005), I hung out with the wrong crowd in drugs, alcoholism, partying, sex, etc.
I don’t know how I managed to get myself accepted into college, because during high school years I was a very awful student. It was towards the end of 2005, is when I dropped out of college and severely suffered from long-term depression and contemplated suicide.
During this year, I had a drug dealer friend who was also a Christian (or backsliding Christian). Every time he would comeover my apartment, we would get high on drugs, and he would always pull out the bible and play Christian music in the background. I would become extremely irritated and I asked him “I just want to enjoy my high, you pulling out Christian crap is destroying my enjoyment, what would it take for you to stop doing that?”. He replied, “come to my church retreat.”. I answered “Hell no”.
He responded, “There’s girls!”. I quickly replied in enthusiasm, “Oh?! In that Case, SURE! I’ll go!”.

After I went to the church retreat (which was located at Virginia Beach), the messages I heard from the guest speaker spoke to me and impacted me hard. God wrecked me, and I returned to God.
It was during this retreat, is when I became baptized by the water at the ocean.

After I came back from the church retreat, I fell back into temptation. And I felt extremely guilty. I made a promise to God that I would stop all the things I did such as Drugs.
My friend and I felt extremely convicted during our drug high.
It was around midnight, clear sky, and all of a sudden a thunderstorm came out of nowhere.
We got the impression, that must have been the anger of God.
So we huddled into my basement of my family’s house, and balled tears so hard and prayed til sunrise.
It was 6AM, and this was my very first supernatural experience I will never forget. I had an open vision, where I saw the Holy Ghost appear out of thin air and wrapped two arms around my torso and hugged me. It had a figure of a man, a silhouette of a person, but it was colored in a transparent blue hue. As soon as the Holy Ghost hugged me, I felt instant peace inside of me, telling me as if “everything is going to be alright”.
It was unbelievable, and I asked my friend if he saw the same thing my eyes just bore witness to, but he was 12 yards away from me and still occupied with praying in the fetal position.
I will never forget that experience, because it was my first supernatural experience.

In 2006, I wanted to use my artistic talents for God. So I focused all my life on my artistic abilities in music, art, dance, film, theatre, design. After getting publicity exposure from being written in newspapers, and hired by several well-known companies such as Toyota Scion Motors.
I was hired by many other businesses to paint murals and commissioned for paintings from $700 to $5,000 per project.
The fame fueled my ego, which eventually turned me arrogant, and I was all about my own self-glory.
I forgot about God from 2006 to 2011. During those 5 years, I also created an entrepreneurial small business in digital media production (audio engineering, music production, film production, graphic design, teaching). And I was concentrated on my own fame, recognition, which eventually made me feel “empty” inside.

2012 came, and I decided to go on my first missions trip with the church that I seldomly attended (Franconia Baptist Church – Alexandria, VA).
I became baptized by the Spirit during the missions trip, where I encountered God supernaturally.
It impacted me a lot. I was in a land of poverty, and started realizing that we live like kings in America. We take a lot of things for granted and we live in an Incubator, sheltered out of what is really going on in the world.

After returning from the missions trip back to the U. S. of A.
I strongly felt that God was calling me to find a new church and grow myself in a new community to start the new chapter of my life as a “spirit-filled believer”.
I attended Northern Virginia House of Prayer, New Song Church, The Gate church, and Whole Word Fellowship Church from 2012 to 2015.
I attended all 4 of the churches consistently, I also became a staff as one of the leaders serving in the ministry.
Although, as I was being discipled by my elders, It was extremely difficult for me to submit to authority at the time. I responded in offense quickly and became rebellious.
This brought my reputation to an all time low and all the Christians who knew me avoided me everywhere I went deeming me as “arrogant” or “heretic”.

I felt betrayed and offended.
It was later that I had a revelation, that the reason why I became so quick to offense, anger, rebelling authority and submission was because the last 25 years of being exposed to domestic violence, physical abuse, alcoholism, drugs, adultery, gambling, etc. It actually suppressed me to be able to fully become receptive to obtain a “teachable-spirit”. I started to realize that I have deep wounds that needed healing. Otherwise if I didn’t seek any counseling/healing, then I will still continue to view things in a wounded angle of perception. So I discerned about it in a 6 month sabbatical. I wrote down all the issues in my journal as clearly and detailed as I could be. And I ventured out finally and took the initiative to get healed.
In 2014 throughout that entire year, I went to 7 different healing ministries such as Judith MacNutt’s Christian Healing Ministry Jacksonville FL, Reverend Koo’s Healing Counseling, Healing Grace, Northern Virginia House of Prayer Healing, Bethel Sozo DC, Healing Rooms of DC, and some healing conferences.
I also took the liberty to seek not only Christian Elders for advisory, consultation, discipleship, but I also went to 7 different Christian counselors on a weekly session for 4 to 6 hours. It was really good. I needed it a lot.

It also made me see in clarity the reason why my life was on this up and down winding journey was because God has always been there for me, but the enemy was trying to do whatever it takes to steer me in the wrong direction. Yet I was still trying to find and yearn for that “home” to feel like I belong, which was trying to return to find the love of Abba Father.

Those Christian Counselors today, actually became my elders now that I have been submitted under and discipled under. They have rebuked me several times, and I have grown to accept it and overlook it the offense as positive encouragement. It was around late 2014 to Present, is when I started really maturing more in a Godly character. To be not just a man of God, but His son.

It was also during 2012, I originally tried to go to YWAM, but things didn’t work out, there was a lot of discouragement in the air. The enemy tried to use my loved ones and closest friends to discourage me.
So I spent the last 3 years from 2012 to present, discerning to see if I am truly called to go to YWAM.
During those 3 years, I also travelled to other ministries such as YWAM KC itself and IHOP-KC.
Also during those 3 years, I’ve made a lot of new friends who are current YWAM, IHOPKC, BETHEL staff and I’ve also encountered many confirmations throughout the years.
There were confirmations in people, in scripture, in the supernatural, visions, dreams, prophetic words, Jericho walks, and situations. I ended up video recording my confirmations and uploaded them on my youtube channel to help remind me that what I witnessed was a promise in the name of Yeshua, and it was also not a way to second guess myself as I noticed that is what the enemy tries to do.

It was in Winter 2014, is when I got the impression nudged by the Holy Spirit to return to my original church Franconia Baptist Church, which is now known as Crossover Community Church.
I became so transformed by the significant change in how God delivered, restored, renewal, revived, and healed me, that I felt compelled to help those who needed to see that God is not just this King, God, Lord, Savior, Advocate, Teacher. But that He is also a dear personal friend too.
I didn’t care about a position within the church, or a deacon, or a mentor. All I cared about was being a brother to the other brothers and sisters in the body of Christ of that community. I cared about community, and the hearts of His people.

The Healing that took place in 2014 year, made me see in full clarity, that people who appear stubborn, unreceptive, unteachable spirit, prideful, arrogant, troubled is just what’s on the surface. What I started to see is that there were wounds underneath, and it came from a lot of brokenness, pain, and hurt from what happened in the past. And there was no sense of compassion in the present for those people. Legalism of the Religious spirit & Condemnation made it worse for them.
So it truly motivated me to love people regardless of flaws. I started to look past the exterior, and see that all they really needed is for someone who cares about them and loves them just as Jesus has.

Anyways, I’ve come a long way now, and I’ve begun to truly understand that God loves me and He has chosen me.

Qualified to Correct


“LET’S ATTEMPT TO DISECT ONE OF THE TOP QUESTIONS IN HISTORY AND PHILOSOPHY. WHAT IS LOVE? Unfortunately, our culture has been diluted with lies. “Love is for losers. Love is for wussies. Who needs love?” Well everybody does, even if they don’t admit it or realize it. We are nothing without the love of our significant other, parents, friends, or God. Let’s look at the result of these lies: True love is now hard to find. So what is love? God is Love. Let’s look at what Love himself has to say about this. Start with the famous Corinthians 13:4. And then continue on below.

Love is dying for the other person. “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8) Humiliating yourself for the other person. “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.” (Philippians 2:3-4) Putting your name on the line for the other person. Willing to get rejected for that other person. “Jesus said unto them, Verily I say unto you, a prophet is with honor, except in his own country, and among his own kin, and in his own house. No prophet is acceptable in his own country.” (Matthew 13:57) Jesus, The Prophet Himself, was rejected in His hometown of Nazareth. “And he said, Verily I say unto you, No prophet is accepted in his own country.” Luke 4:24 Taking that other person’s sins/burdens and carrying it (cross) for the sake of that person “He himself bore our sins” in his body on the cross, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; “by his wounds you have been healed.” (1 Peter 2:24) BUT REMEMBER, IT TAKES AT LEAST 2 PEOPLE FOR LOVE TO FUNCTION PROPERLY. The other person being loved must accept that love (through our God given free will, Proverbs 16:9) by his or her own choice, or else it becomes something else. Unfortunately, what I see these days is actually not love. Rather, I see manipulation/deception, and ultimately slavery. This is not love, but a disgusting imitation thereof. “The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.” (Proverbs 16:9) The person being loved must ask for forgiveness. “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32) In order for love to work properly, the person being loved must have faith/trust. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.” (Proverbs 3:5) Therefore, since we have been justified by FAITH, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. (Romans 5:1) No guilt is necessary (Romans 8:1) for that is not the point, but do eagerly welcome correction (Proverbs 12:1) For the sake of not the other person bringing the correction, but for the sake of the RELATIONSHIP. Once the mistake has been corrected, the previous sin will be erased, like it never happened. And then the fun starts. Henceforth, you must continue necessary communication, and necessary honesty in order to keep that love going in the right way. THE STANDARD THAT JESUS SET WAS: CARRY YOUR OWN CROSS. DIE FOR ME BECAUSE I DIED FOR YOU. Matthew 16:24. BUT… You don’t have to die for that person, but how about a hug, a kiss on the cheek, a thank you, or attempt at a conversation? Let’s really love each other guys. If the standard is too much, at least TRY, and trust me it will be appreciated by the ones who died for you. That’s all some of us can ask for…”-Patrick DeJesus Jan 13, 2014:

What Pat says is true.
However, Pat is forgetting one key element. “Who” has the authority to give that correction?
That’s why we have to identify the differences between a mentor and an accountability partner and a friend to a stranger.
Mentors & Accountability Partners have the valid right to give correction, because they have been disciplined through submission to authority. Trained to know how to deliver correct rebukement.

fact is, anyone can give correction. but only a few know how to say it right in a mature appropriate professional way of communication without anger, impatience, emotions, hastiness, quick to response.
that’s what it takes to be a leader.

What does it mean to be a Christian?

What does it mean to be a Christian?

It means to persevere into the stages of maturity from immaturity.
It means to be a Sinner walking into the walk with the Lord.
It means to acknowledge and accept our sinful nature and know that we will continue to sin in the future.
It means to identify we will hurt people in the future, but through Christ we will learn how to love and be better human beings.

So when atheists or nonbelievers say
Christians are hypocrites. What’s the point of being a Christian or going to church if they never keep their word, or lie, cheat, steal, cuss, fck up in life?

“Jesus is ideal and wonderful, but you Christians – you are not like him.”
-Mahatma Gandhi

The focus isn’t on our behavior, attitude, or actions. It’s not what we are appeared on the outside. Being a Christian means to know we are the biggest scumbags on the planet but instead of following ourselves, we follow Christ to help us lead ourselves out of destruction.

If we don’t have Christ, then we will continue to live in ourselves, and our self desires.
Although, if we live in Christ, we know love.

That’s what makes Christianity different from all religions in the world, because the whole core is about LOVE.

If a religion like islam is only about protocol, then the muslims will never know what love is and how to love. Muslims stay faithful to only the indignation of mechanics.

We’re not robots. We’re humans.
As humans, we have a heart and are an image of God.
an image of God, doesn’t mean physically, but spiritually.
And if God is love, then we are a mirror to Him, a reflection of Love.
We may not be the real love construct, but only a mirror, a mirror that yearns to know what it’s like to be the original construct.

Think of it like this:
Aram stares into the mirror. His reflection is in the mirror, but his reflection is not really the original Aram. It is only a reflection. The reflection doesn’t really know what it’s like to feel the emotions of Aram. But Aram does.

And if we continue to live our lives as a mirror without trying to strive to be the original, then we will never learn how to be the original. 

True Strength

Now I’m not trying to be a sexist or masculinist or anything.

But I’m only trying to find a SOLUTION for MEN to become fully enveloped into MATURITY. To become  a MAN OF GOD.

Women will never be equal to us men.

The way the modern society is nowadays with validating opportunities to invoke Women’s Rights & Freedom and Feminist has truthfully given women a double standard.

It’s become so much as a Double Edged Sword; Dangerous grounds.

The reason why women will never be equal to man is because they lack comprehensively maturity, self-control, and they neurologically/psychologically respond to emotions rather than what us men respond to which is logic and reasoning.

There are times where women will frequently screw up, make mistakes. And in doing so, they will never admit their wrongs nor let alone apologize. Because of their self pride that consumes them.

However this does not mean for us men to take offense to it.

It means to grow in it and move on with our lives, this grows maturation for us men.

Now if women can never be equal to man. Then what are women good for?

Women were created and designed to be the fruit of our hardships, maturity, and perseverance. They were born for love. They were destined to be loved. We as men need to learn what love is. And the best way to emphasize what love is, is to love women.
Every single female you’ve ever known always wants to be loved, appreciated, praised, embraced, and enjoyed, because deep down they just want to know real sincere genuine honest true and real love.

Now if a woman messes up, that doesn’t mean it validates us men to hold a grudge against them, fight, argue, hate, dislike against them. It means to learn how to love them.
And how do we learn to love them? By shutting down our own selfishness, self interests, self pride, and develop humility. This is how we males can walk into maturity.

If you ever see a male act like a female (And this has nothing to do with homosexuality/transgender/androgynous, this is about maturation), then it means that male is actually a boy, and not a man.
A boy will always complain, stay immature, be arrogant, cocky, prideful, vindictive, narcissist behavior, lack self control, lack patience and understanding, stay ignorant/ close-minded/bias, respond to offense and emotions, be very sensitive, lack reflection, lack discernment, be egotistic, be fearful, be reserved, argue, fight, point fingers, point faults, point the blame.

The reason why a woman will never be equal to us is simply because the world & society we have always lived in is geared towards a life for man.
A woman’s role is only in the areas of being an advisor, guidance counselor, loved, and a daughter.
A woman will never know what true strength is, because of the way their upbringing affects themselves, whether it be in the choices they make, their mentality, their approach, their lifestyle, their psychology, their soul.
It’s because since the world is geared to man only, it’s also for building up strength for a boy to become a man.
True strength is discipline, sacrifice, submission to authority, selflessness, & servintude. It’s when you know you can’t have it your way or the things in life frustrates you, but you submit and sacrifice anyways. Through the submission, you actually develop into maturity and you understand strength.

True strength also is even after you commit to submission, you stay loyal to the entry of your commitment, long after the mood/emotion has left, and without complaining about the negative areas of the area.

So when the going gets tough, and the tough gets going, you keep going!

Yet, Boys cannot automatically transition instantly into a man.
There are many different stages of maturity and immaturity.
Stage 1, Stage 2, Stage 3, Stage 4, Stage 5, Stage 6, and so on…
But it’s about trudging through the thick tar pit to understand how far you’ve come through the obstacle course, where you can be able to reflect which stage of immaturity or maturity you’re at now and which stage of maturity/immaturity do you need to face next and what it takes or tools you need to carry with you to reach the next level and continue persevering into the struggle.

However, the moment your mental perception thinks it is a struggle or you’re struggling is the absence of focus and letting immature influence you again.

As Men, we  need to STAY STRONG.
in order to stay strong, we look to the guidance of authority, who is God, Christ, and if we are offered a female counterpart to root us on in this battle, then she would be our advisor. Who is either our wife, girlfriend, fiancée, friend, sister.

The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps. Prov 16:9

True strength doesn’t lie in physical strength or combat skill. It lies in the inside. It’s beneath the heart. It lies in will power.

“a Long time ago in the deep forest of Okinawa, Japan. There was a hunter who was hunting for tiger. He thought he saw a rabbit in his view, so he took his bow and arrow and released. Only to find his arrow shot through a rock. He was baffled, and said “how could an arrow penetrate through a stone?”. And  so He practiced trying to pierce this stone with his arrows. He failed every attempt. He tried and tried again. All his arrows kept shattering and breaking. Until the next day, He thought he saw a tiger in the forest again, So he took our his bow and arrow and released. Only to find his arrow pierced through a striped stone. It was his willpower that pierced through the stone.”-Old Samurai Proverb.

You see if we just focus on our willpower, we can accomplish anything. Focus on the KILL to KILL. If we half-ass or lack focus, we will never be able to pierce through the stone. It’s about how bad do you want to succeed? It’s about how much do you want to achieve? If  you slightly believe you could do it, you will never be able to do it. Think as “I WILL DO IT AS IF MY LIFE DEPENDED ON IT”. Because science of this nature comes from your passion. Passion helps to re-direct that power in the inside to achieve anything. Without passion, then we will lose focus. And if you let the distractions get in the way, it will cloud your view and mess up the arrow’s target. Stay focused, Don’t take offense. Means to trudge through maturity & success.

Now if women will never be our equal, you must learn how to love them, no matter what. No matter how many times they mess up or hurt you. You have to learn how to love them. Why?
Think of it like this.

You know that story…

Hosea loves Gomer.
Gomer is infamous for idolatry  to prostitution. But even though Hosea knows Gomer sleeping with other men, and still comeback to Hosea, Hosea still loves her.


We are basically prostitutes, but Jesus will always still continue to love us no matter how many men we sleep with.

We will always sin or have a sinful nature or think of sins.
We will always be a prostitute to lust, idolatrate things, complain, put our focus on pointing faults, put focus on our selfish interests like food or career or money or status or self glory or substances or the things we know will be between Jesus and us.
But Jesus already knows of our sins and what we will do in the future, but He doesn’t bash on us for this, He embraces you with welcome arms, and invites you to a celebration party feast. He embraces you, because He loves you.

So with this said, If you know someone who has fcked up, it doesn’t validate us to hate them. It means to keep loving them, just as Jesus has done for us.
When we put our focus on hating them for them fcking up, it not only does hurt them but it pursues to grow in immaturity and we live in the absence of love and impatience, lack of self control, selfishness, and pride.

If you think God is telling you what you’ve done wrong and is hating for you in doing so.
And you’re trembling in fear by this.

That is not of God, that is the enemy trying to trick you and put FEAR in you, and brainwash you to think that is how God will always act towards you when you fck up in life.

Remember, God is LOVE. God will never want to harm his children, his daughters, his sons. He loves you.

Remind yourselves that obviously to love God is to fear God, but fearing God is not the same thing as God trying to put fear into us. That’s where you have to identify what is of God and what is coming from the enemy?